Meet the bears

These are the bears. My sweet precious little bears, Kiernan and Beckett. If they were carrying the rings they would be ring bears, but due to not trusting them with thousands of dollars worth of jewelry they are just bears.

My little bears and I have been through a lot and I absolutely adore them. They are very excited for Caleb to be their step-dad. Kiernan has been telling everyone that he's getting a new daddy and every night before bed Beckett examines my ring and asks me about what it means and talks about Caleb and Mommy getting married.

My favorite was around valentines day, Kiernan's teacher (Ms. Denisa) asked each of the kids what love was and wrote down their responses. Kiernan said, "Love is when you give someone a ring and marry them and become a family". When I read that, my heart absolutely melted.

I am so happy and greatful that they get to have a stable father figure in their lives at such a young age and that Caleb loves them and is as excited as he is about being a step dad. He has been reading websites on parenting and has been looking for a good blog on stepfamilies. That is also pretty heart melting

I can't even describe the joy I feel when I think about the boys in their little tuxes at the wedding. It's going to be absolutely ridiculously cute.

A flower for your thoughts

These are Gerbera Daisies and they are my wedding flower of choice.
I love them, a lot. They are so, fun and vibrant and slightly unconventional. I feel like they really capture the spirit of our wedding.

I haven't decided on a color yet. I really like the pink ones and the yellow ones, they are my favorite.

My bouquet is going to be a little bundle of daisies, stems intact. Simple and pretty.
The boys are each going to hold a single daisy. In my mind it's perfect and beautiful, but I am pretty sure they will turn the them into swords. Ha ha. Oh well, I guess that's what you get for taking the pillow away from the ring bears and making them hold flowers.

Introducing: The wedding party

So, these are the men of the wedding party.
Beginning from the top:

Rev. Gabe Strine - Officiant. He has graciously agreed to officiate our intimate ceremony. Caleb officiated his and Kelly's wedding, so we were very pleased when Gabe agreed to do ours. You may know Gabe from the now defunct Spokane Comedy Sportz or from his comic Brinkerhoff. If it wasn't already apparent he is Caleb's brother and my soon to be brother-in-law. (The beautiful woman in the picture with him is his wife Kelly).

Mr. Tod Hoseit - Best Man. Well, I hope I spelt his name right (I always think it looks Japaneese). This is Caleb's BFF and roommate 1 of 2, Tod. He and Caleb met doing Comedy Sportz and have been besties ever since. Tod likes beer, George Foreman and cheerleaders.

Mr. Craig Heider - Man of Honor. Last but most certainly not least. Craig is my bestie. We met during math class in 8th grade. We were in rival friend groups and initially hated each other... that has clearly changed. Craig spends his free time rolling silverware and drinking.

Those is our people.
Small.
Intimate.
Exactly how we want it. I get the distinct honor of being the only woman up there.

I love these guys, I really do and I am so honored that they are willing and eager to be apart of our lovely day.

Update: Why the art?

The new addition to the side of the blog is a Gustav Klimt gadget. I couldn't believe it when I stumbled upon it, he 's Caleb's favorite artist and he actually has one of his pieces (mermaids, I believe it's called) tattooed on his arm.

Just something I thought it would be fun to add.

The Meeting

People are always asking me where/how we met and it's a bit of a story, so...
Lets take a walk back a year and a half ago to when Caleb and I met.

Well, it was late August '07. The Blue Door Theatre was doing their annual Cagematch show. (An improv competition where teams compete against each other and the winner is chosen by audience vote). Caleb was the captain of The Four Horsemen and my good friend happened to be dating the "CageMaster" (see, host). The CageMaster thought that having a couple hot frenchmaid CageMistresses to use as assistance and eye candy would be a good idea (insert Tanya and I).

Our first duty as CageMistresses was to make signs with the team names. I happened to be working on the Four Horsmen's sign. I wrote out in big colorful letters "The Four Hoursemen" (for real). We got to interplayers where the show was and I was a little nervous. I hadn't been on stage for a couple of years and so, Tanya was teaching me a little about what she learned in modeling school about how to walk. I was practicing and practicing backstage and got to feeling pretty good about it. Tanya and I then were relaxing and talking (which usually includes a lot of loud giggling). Then I noticed that the leader of one of the cagematch teams who had short dark hair was ushering his group away from us, haters.

The show began and as I am walking out with my careful crafted sign, doing my perfect walk The Four Horsemen charged out and began galloping around me! This was not in my game plan, but I powered through amidst much laughter. The show proceded and ended with The Four Horsemen being the Cagematch champions. I was responsible for giving the team captain (read: Caleb) the trophy. Anne wanted me to kiss him, but I wasn't about to kiss some guy I didn't know.

Post show we all ended up going to Europa. Jeremiah (CageMaster) was thanking Tanya and I for our service by treating us to all we could eat and drink. We sat there laughing and drinking the night away, when the guy from the winning team came over and asked us what happend to our frenchmaid costumes (real original) he then preceded to use that winning humor to have us in stiches before returning to his table. A while later he came back, sat with us and we continued to talk ( and laugh) the night away. It was getting on time to leave when the four of us decided to move the party to one of the Gonzaga bars (it just so happened that Caleb and Tanya lived across the street from each other for a couple of years and didn't know it). Caleb needed to stop at home first. We dropped our extra stuff off at Tanya's and get Caleb at the bar. We talked and laughed and drank some more before it was time to call it a night.

I was really feeling this guy and was sure he would get my number at the end of the night, but we ended up parting with no number exchange. What happened? I was sure he was into me. The next day I got a message from him on MATCH.COM. It just so happened that we were both on the site and he recognized me from there at Europa so, he went home before we went to the bar to check out my profile. The funny thing is after I got his profile I remembered seeing him before, also. We emailed back and forth for a few weeks before Tanya and I set up a game night with the pretense of hooking us up. A few emails and an awkward first phone call later and Caleb asked me out for our first date. The rest, they say, is history.

When ever I think about our "meeting" story, it always amazes me all the different factors that came together to allow us to meet at the perfect time. I was actually dating a guy who was supposed to come to Cagematch that night. Had he been there, Caleb and I wouldn't have spoken. Caleb's longterm on-again off-again had just moved out of state. Had she been there, again we probably wouldn't have talked. I had reached the point of being over everything that went down with my ex and was feeling confident again. I just so happened to be good friends with someone who was dating someone who knew Caleb. He just so happened to ask me to be a Cagemistress. When I think about all the things that were choreographed perfectly to allow us to meet and start dating, it blows my mind.

I think my favorite anecdote about us meeting, is that we both saw each other on match before we met and we didn't contact each other. I still remember my impression of him. Ha ha he's funny too bad he isn't interested in a girl with kids. We joke about creating a TV ad for Real Life.

Oh and to wrap up what I was saying in the beginning of the story. Apparently, he was having a hard time not staring at me and focusing on what he was saying to his team. Ha ha ha.

I think the take-away message is: When in doubt wear a frenchmaid costume.

Introducing: The groom

So, this is Caleb. I love him. I love him, a lot. I have been trying to write my vows the last couple days and I am discovering it's really hard to articulate the level of love I feel for him. In writing my vows my feelings for him have been oozing all over the place. So, I decided it may be the perfect time to shout out 5 wonderful things about my man (in no particular order).

1. He treats me like a lady, like a precious pearl that he's promised to keep. I didn't realize it was possible to treat anyone with this level of care and tenderness and respect. I can actually feel his adoration.

2. He challenges my intellect. He's smarter than I am and I am so happy to say that. Being an intelligent girl makes dating challenging. There are few things more frustrating than being with a man you think is a moron. Caleb keeps me stimulated and interested in a way that few people ever have.

3. He makes me laugh. and laugh. and laugh. We are always laughing. Even when things are hard or I'm mad he can still make me laugh.

4. He is honest. I know I can trust everything that comes out of his mouth. I have met few people who's word is as valuable as his. It's soothing to know that even though he's not bubbling over with emotion at every turn, when he says something he means it.

5. I love him. Deeply truly love him in a way that's different than love I've felt before. I can't explain why we work or how we work, but we do. It just works.

In looking for a good quote to put in my vows I found this, Eric Fromm quote, "Immature love says: ' I love you because I need you.' Mature love says: 'I need you because I love you."

After much soul searching, I discovered that reason #342 why my first marriage failed was I didn't love him for the right reasons. I loved him because I needed something from him (something it turned out he couldn't give me). I was too young to know that wasn't love.

Now, I have my shit together. I don't need anything from Caleb, except him. I love him and now that I've found him I can't imagine living without him. I feel light and hope when I'm with him. Our future radiates brilliantly and thinking about our life together makes me giddy.

I love him, the words sound so small, but they are all I know to say.

Introducing: The bride

So, it seems obvious when beginning a blog series which involves myself, that I would begin with myself. Because when I'm being honest, I'll admit I'm a little self absorption.

Anywho, I'm Ashley and I'm marrying Caleb.

Oddly enough, As much as I love talking about myself, I really dislike summarizing myself. So, I will instead tell you the 7 wedding things that make me squeal and giggle whenever I think about them.

1) Having incredible photos taken in downtown Seattle by our amazing photog.

2) Doing the big dress reveal with Caleb.

3) Seeing Tod, Craig and the boys in their tooperfectforwordsattire.

4) Doing our family unity painting.

5) Gabe saying, "I introduce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Caleb Strine".

6) Our first dance.

7) Making our way to the reception dinner (where we ate the night he proposed), as husband and wife.

How did we get here you ask?

Well, they say the beginning is a good place to start and although I rarely listen to "them", on this I tend to agree. So, here is "the story". Yes, it's copied and pasted from my myspace because I already wrote it on there.

So, I think it's safe to tell everyone now that Caleb and I have been talking about marriage for about 4 months now (5 months). For about the first 8 months of being together we took things VERY slowly.

And then we decided to go to Chicago.

And then we decided it was time for him to meet Kiernan and Beckett.

Somewhere between watching him laughing playing with the boys and boarding that train to Chicago I fell head over heals in love with him.

Then last week happened and Caleb stepped up and totally took care of us. Spending hours shoveling out my driveway, carrying the boys around in the snow, driving us everywhere... I was totally amazed at all he was willing to do for us.

So, we drove to Seattle Saturday to see the Seahawks game. It was an alright drive despite being 3 degrees most the way and some white knuckles going over the pass. We got to the hotel (Ace Hotel for you hipsters out there) in belltown and discovered all the streets going towards the water were closed due to snow and ice (they are crazy steep).

We ended up going to a wonderful restaurant that night (Flying Fish) and had one of the best meals of our lives (NO, I am NOT exaggerating). We had planned on hitting the town hard that night, but due to the snow, ice and cold decided to return to the hotel for some Absolut apeach and OJ.

We spent awhile talking, laughing and messing around on the internet when Caleb stood up kind of weird and instructed me to sit on the edge of the bed and close my eyes. Ooookay... So, I did what he asked and heard him rustling around in his coat. It felt like I had my eyes closed for like 3 minutes. Then he finally said, "Open your eyes".

He was in front of me on one knee holding a little square black box.

I instantly started freaking out, but managed to remain seated. He then began to tell me (in a tearful incredibly sweet way) that he has never in his life been happier than he is with me and that there is no one he would rather almost die with while we are sliding around on streets (that's another story) or in a Rage mosh pit (story from lola) than me and that the thing he wants most in life is for me to be his wife. I know he said other things and it saddens me that I don't remember it verbatim, but in my defense I was also crying and laughing and flipping out.

I clearly said, " Yes, I would love to be your wife". After that it gets fuzzy again. I remember a lot of screaming and jumping and hugging and kissing and laughing. Then I called my mom. The next hour or so was spent telling everyone we know via myspace, phone, and text. (thank god for technology)

Caleb then proceeded to tell me he had the ring on him all day and kept trying to find a nice romantic place to propose, but the cold on the way over and the snow and ice in Seattle had shafted all his ideas. He said ultimately he knew it was more important that he do it rather than worry about how he would do it. I agree.

I also found out he text half our friends when we got to Seattle and told them he was going to propose that night and he had asked my mom's blessing before we left.

Now a few closing sentiments.

I have never in my life been happier than I am when I'm with him. He treats me like a lady. I know that sounds so simple, but I have never had anyone treat me with the care and respect that he does. We always laugh. Even when it feels like the world is exploding all around us (which happens more than you would think), we can laugh. He is perfect for me. I love him and respect him more than I could ever possibly communicate in words.

He treats my children wonderfully. He loves them and is ready to treat them as his own. [Yes, in a few years he will have his own ; ) ] If they grow into even half the man he is I will consider it a job well done.

I would just like to say thank you to all of Caleb's friends and family that have opened their arms and hearts to me. I love and cherish all of you and I look forward to watching our relationships grow and deepen in the years to come. Rest assured, I love him like I've never loved anyone before and I am prepared to spend the rest of my life caring for him and making him as happy as he makes me.

Yeah, I folded.

So, I gave in and created a WedSite. Yeah, that's actually what they are called. I opted for the blogger over the traditional WedSite hosts because they are lame.
This will probably also be lame, but at least the lame will be my own instead of some WedSite designers at theknot.

I am going to resist ever calling this a wedsite again. We'll see how it goes.

I like showing off is the main reason I created this and I like keeping in contact with people in the most low maintenance way possible when it comes to wedding details.

I am going to head the haters off at the pass that point out the jumped gun email name. Gmail is popular and I wanted to make sure I would be able to get the new email I wanted. I didn't, some one beat me to the astrine punch. So, anstrine it is. I am not using my new email until 6:30pm May 23rd. So, don't use it until then. It happened to come in handy for starting the wedsite, though (I know I said I would try).

Things I plan on posting here:
- Pictures of wedding related things
- Intros to our wedding party
- Information on the Spokane reception
- Our vows
- Our readings
- Song lists
- lots and lots of pictures
- probably at least one rant
- whatever else makes sense